In the past several months, ever since the country went on lockdown because of COVID-19, we have heard the shocking news about teenage pregnancy. But is it shocking? The media has highlighted the girls in question, interviewing them about their ordeal. Some of it is gruesome but most of it the lie of fleeting pleasures of the human body- sex! If you are living beyond our borderlines, what is the situation like in your country?
Anyway, the issue is that whenever pregnancy comes up in any set-up, the ladies get discriminated. Society deems them immoral and very careless, and many young men would dare even say how they would not want to marry a lady with a child! A story for another day. Think of the story of the lady caught in the act of adultery (John 8:1-11) and how she ended up before Jesus alone, as if she was engaging in sexual activity alone.
The Samaritan woman in John 4 is evidence as well that the lady was on the spot more than the partner- the man. We know that miraculous birth was one of its kind (Luke 1:26-38). There never has and never will there be another one like it. For every teenage or unplanned pregnancy by an unmarried person, there is an irresponsible man involved! Their irresponsibility makes them responsible for the growing child inside the womb. For this, they should take responsibility for their irresponsibility.
STYLE UP AND OWN UP
Exodus 22:16 is an example of what God expected of the Israelites back in the day. He demanded and commanded that a man who impregnates a woman who is not his wife should pay the total bride price and take her in as a wife. Well, we might say things have changed. The only thing that has changed for the worst is the level of social injustice done by unsuspecting boys and girls. When a girl is pregnant, unquestionably, a boy is involved at 100%. Young men need to style and own up these pregnancies. We need to find it in our hearts, with the same motivation we had while luring the lady to bed, to be responsible. May I offer two perspectives of this proposal:
a. Style up in your singlehood. Do not run around spreading your seed everywhere. It is doubtless that one of the causes of anarchy and chaos- their core being Sin- is the prevalence of fatherless children. To have self-respect means that you chose to treat others better than yourself (Philippians 2:3). Do not live for yourself. Selfish people seldom make it far in life. Their selfishness is their most significant barrier.
b. Own up your singlehood. Be content that being single is part of God’s plan for your life. In singlehood, God teaches us how to depend on him so that we may undo some long-standing, manly mistakes that have wrecked generations. You will not be abnormal if you never have sex before marriage. You can wait to be a different gem in a world that is in need. Owning up means we appreciate that we are complete in who God (Colossians 2:10) created us to be, whether or not we have a partner.
SHAPE UP AND GROW UP
Many people get the gist of a piece of advice when they are in the consequences caused by their ignorance. For many who have children out of wedlock or early pregnancy victims, the sense of countless conversations by their parents or pastors hits home rater too late. Be that as it may, as young men, we need to shape up and grow up. To shape us is to live up to some directives or ethos. To act responsible and up for the task ahead. When we shape up, we grow up! Childish thoughts go far away from our minds. Our once, timid and arrogant hearts, now find a reason to engage in significant life issues. When you make a lady pregnant, shape up to the fatherly roles that lie ahead. Own up the child as yours and take the mile to fend for and care for the family. Why should we have pregnancy cases minus the confrontation of us young men who, before the world, make it look like the angel Gabriel visited again? The young woman might be pregnant, but you are pregnant as well! You made the pregnancy at least at more than 95% of the contribution.
Some young men say they are so young to become fathers. The same is true for the girl- she is so young. Selfishness is to enjoy the fleeting pleasure of sex before marriage and claim ‘accident’ when it comes to owning up a pregnancy. The high road is for you to be more considerate of the lady before pursuing your selfish desires (Philippians 2:3). Do not lure her into bed and play with her vulnerable emotional state. Her naivety and curiosity should not be misused. Refrain from unnecessary flirtatious conversations for the fun of it. It is ungodly to flirt and cause others the desires you cannot rightfully satisfy. Think of her as highly as you would want someone to think of your mother or sister. To take advantage of a young girl and get beefed-up when another man hits on your mother is the deepest form of hypocrisy ever! Young man, shape up and grow up.
There is no miracle, angel Gabriel baby anymore! For every pregnant young girl, there is an irresponsible young man running rogue; seeking for another destroy. Yes. There is a wicked heart in need of Christ’s work for every struggling, pregnant teenager. As a society, we need to get hold of these young men and make them responsible for their actions. Yes. As believers, we must safeguard the lives and hearts of our young men- by guiding them into truth and holding them responsible for early pregnancies. And young girls as well, by warning them against the marauding nature of men who have no intention to care for them, only to steal their dignity by speaking up from a scriptural perspective.