In many instances, the term fellowship refers to a gathering of believers in a church or any place of worship. As long as there are several of us, many will call it a fellowship. This is not at all wrong. However, I have wondered a great deal about what really defines these fellowships and whether they really fit the Bible’s definition. In fact, I have asked myself whether I have genuine fellowship with the people I call friends or fellow saints, or if it is just random interactions. Let us consider a few thoughts from the scriptures and see how we can best understand ‘the fellowship of believers’ in a more enriching manner.
More Than Coffee and Donuts
The biblical mandate for Koinonia (fellowship) goes beyond a meet-up with a few friends for coffee and donuts. The setup is not the end but merely a precursor. It creates the environment for a meet-up, but once the setting is in place, there has to be something more. A setting for a meeting is like soup before a buffet — it whets the appetite just before the main course. I have had many meaningful conversations over coffee and donuts (I love both) during my time in ministry. In fact, I prefer that kind of setting, but only if I am intentional about making it more than just coffee, chill, and random vibes. So, what does the Bible call us to engage in once the coffee and donut are served?
Acts 2:42 highlights several things the disciples did when they met over their version of coffee and donuts.
- Breaking bread: Dr. Luke, author of the book of Acts, wrote that they devoted themselves to the breaking of bread. If we rewind a little, Jesus, after one of his intentional ‘coffee and donut’ moments in the upper room, had engaged the disciples in a meal that would not just be a meal but a meaningful time of worship, connection, and service (Matthew 26:26-28, Luke 22:14-20, and Mark 14:22-25). That night, he ate with them and served the bread and cup ‘after dinner/supper’–a symbolic act and an ordinance that would remind us of the importance of fellowship, which is serving each other, and profoundly so. Jesus knew he was a few days away from laying down his life for us at the cross and redeeming us from sin. For the disciples, that meal would become a memorial of what true fellowship is all about: laying our lives down for others, for the glory of God. At the depth of fellowship lies laying our lives down for others. That is, in our interactions, we ought to endeavor to be to one another what Jesus was to the disciples over the three years he served with them. One distinct thing about the three years Christ spent with the disciples was his vulnerability with them (when he was excited, they knew it; when he was angry and disappointed, they knew it, too). He was open with them. But he was also intentional in making time for each of them and guiding them, constantly revealing to them the truths of the Kingdom (Matthew 13:11, 36, 26:38, Mark 14:34). After being done with our ‘coffee and donuts’ moments, can we say we have truly broken bread, i.e, shared deeply and personally with each other in a God-glorifying manner? Yes, the Lord’s Supper is about remembering Christ’s death, and that is foundational. Yet in the moment of the ordinance, Jesus shows what lies within the word ‘fellowship’: candor and depth beyond the food. We also see this in the lives of the disciples in Acts onwards.
- Prayer: Secondly, Dr. Luke wrote that they prayed together. These were not just random, pointless prayers, but heart-deep, impactful ministry to one another. They were not in competition but in loving union as they prayed together. They prayed earnestly when Peter was arrested (Acts 12:5); he was later miraculously released. I am sure that in the wake of the persecution that led to Stephen’s martyrdom, the disciples continued to pray for one another. Fellowship entails praying for one another in all seasons of life.
We have a broader mandate than just relaxing, enjoying a hot cup of tea/coffee, and some nice bites. We must go deeper than small talk and serve one another without fear of malice, gossip, or slander. Is there such safety in the fellowships we have, like it was with Jesus and the disciples?
The Glue of the Gospel
As believers, we are called into community and relationship with others. Many of us do not experience genuine, deep fellowship with other believers because of fear due to past hurts. Inasmuch as it is understandable, humanly speaking, the Bible still requires us to fellowship (Hebrews 10:24-25). Therein, the writer of Hebrew exhorts us to spur one another on to love and good deeds. In the fellowship, we get to share in the common life, mission, suffering, and the grace that comes from salvation through Christ (Acts 4:12; Ephesians 2:8).
- Fellowship binds us together in the hope we have in Christ, uniting believers from varied backgrounds, cultures, and giftings into one beautiful work of grace (Romans 12:4-5, 1 Corinthians 12:12-27).
- Fellowship provides strength and sustenance for believers, especially when we are cracking under the pressures and stresses of living in a broken, tempting world. It is the encouragement in discouraging times, the shield during battle, and the support we need when we are failing (or at least it should be).
- Fellowship puts the gospel on display by exemplifying the love, unity, and shared life of the believing community. It makes believers a visible demonstration of the gospel’s transforming power (John 13:35). Fellowship is the glue that makes the gospel tangible. Its functioning as a glue is the very thing that opens doors for mission and evangelism; no wonder the Lord added to their number each day those who were being saved (Acts 2:42-47).
Walking in the Light
Finally, fellowship is all about walking in the light of the freedom we have in Christ. Paul says that it is for freedom that Christ set us free (Galatians 5:1) and calls us to stay free. Fellowship is what ensures our continuity in the freedom that Christ gives. In fact, John says that, by walking in the light, we receive purification through the blood of Christ (1 John 1:7). What is walking in the light? It means being open with each other about our failures and encouraging one another through Scripture. Just as iron sharpens iron, so are we called to be in fellowship.
Sadly, many churches today seem to expect everybody to be a perfect little angel, making it hard for those who are battling with sin to openly admit their struggle, lest they be judged harshly. Walking in the light does not imply perfection–and neither is it meant to encourage recklessness. Instead, it’s about gently restoring, knowing that we, too, are susceptible to the same sins (Galatians 6:1). Perhaps one reason people do not know genuine fellowship beyond coffee and donuts is that there is no safety in the brotherhood to hold wounded and bleeding brothers close. And because of that leak, believers are comfortable with surface-level connections and not deep ties. Walking in the light is not an event but a process. It is a journey that requires patience and grace, just as Jesus showed to Peter, Judas, the rest of the disciples, and also to us!
In summary, fellowship is connection that goes beyond small talk, good vibes, and ambiance. It is more than social media posts, hashtags, and memes. It’s something more profound, which, sadly, many believers have not experienced due to plasticity and self-preservation. As I personally call myself to order, may we all desire to know this fellowship in the manner which is shown in Scripture. Maybe in those small pockets, we shall see the Lord add to our numbers, not likes and virtual followers, but those who are being saved.