I Left Church But Didn’t Leave God

The above statement has become a common phrase among young people today. The two groups growing in numbers in the states are religious dones and nones. The term for this group of those who left the church but not God is the “religious dones.” On the other hand, religious nones are those who do not want to affiliate themselves with any religion. These groups sadly also exist in Kenya, and the rise of false teachings in the Kenyan Christian circles has contributed tremendously to their rise. In this article, we shall focus on religious dones as we already addressed religious nones in a previous article.

The Church can be defined as the gathering of saints, the body of Christ. The word church can also refer to a spiritual service or a structure where people gather for worship. When people say they have left the church, they will mostly refer to leaving the gathering of saints and the structure where people worship. They will claim to still be in the faith, unlike religious nones who do not associate with any religion whatsoever. 

Why Some Leave Church

Reasons for leaving church will vary from one person to another. After leaving the church, some will start new fellowships at home with like-minded friends. On the other hand, others will stay entirely off matters of faith and use the above statement to shut out any faith-oriented talk. We shall explore some of the reasons why people claim to leave church and not God. 

1. Pastor-centered church: One complaint is that of pastor-centered churches. Pastors have been accused of using the pulpit to enrich themselves at the expense of their members while doing very little to help the struggling church members. Projects to buy pastors’ cars and build houses for them have taken centre stage. Struggling members receive prayer with little to no help. The church is doing exactly what is described in James 2:15-16.  
2. Hurt: Many people have been heartbroken in our churches. Those who have left the church are not against the gospel but against some bizarre things done by those in the faith. Some have been left in a state of abject poverty after their parents gave everything they had to the church. Some are bitter because of neglect, sexual offences, impartiality, and gossip, among other sins.
3. Fear of Commitment: Today, we have a rising generation that fears commitment. They fear marriage, subjecting themselves to the church and being vulnerable to it. They want to get rich fast without following the proper channels. They desire to enjoy the benefits of life without commitment. For example, sex without commitment, wealth without process, Christianity without discipline, love Christ and love the world at the same time. It is not always the church’s fault but also individuals who desire to have their cake and eat it.
4. A lack of desire for truth: We also have a lazy generation that wants to avoid confronting itself with the truth. Any exciting and cheap philosophy lures them. The truth is right there with them, but it doesn’t give them what they want to hear. The idea of heaven and hell, for instance, is not welcomed at all since it prohibits them from living as they wish. In other words, they simply want to be their own gods.     
5. A lack of consideration for youthful voices: Among the challenges I have encountered in a number of churches is that the young people are mostly ignored. Most will admit to feeling as though their voices don’t count in the church. Often, church leaders act as though they know it all, and the young people are seen to lack any wisdom at all. The young people genuinely desire an authentic community. Nevertheless, how will they embrace the church if it is the place where they feel unheard and ignored?

Reasons Not to Leave Church

The experience of religious dones is not much different from that of those who have chosen to stay with the church regardless. I have personally suffered at the hands of Christians from my childhood to when I began to engage in matters of leadership in the church. I grew up in a church where those with money were more valued. Favoritism was done openly. People would offer help, and the right hand plus all and sundry would know (Matthew 6:3). I saw the wealthy getting away with sexual immorality while the abused got excommunicated. All the above would give me adequate reasons to leave the church. However, the following are the reasons why I have remained stuck in church to date.

1. The authenticity of the Bible: The Bible contains real humans who had real challenges, whose sins are reported, and how God reached out to them in their contexts, confronting their evils. That same kind God is still working in the church today.
2. For the sick, the Savior came: The church gatherings referenced in the Bible also had people who struggled; both good and bad could be found in them (Matthew 13:30). Therefore, we should not be surprised when we are offended by some in our churches today. Leaving the church will not solve the problem since God could use my gifts to edify the same church. I embrace the church of Christ in the same way he embraced me in my brokenness. I refuse to let pride blind me to seeing myself as better than those in the church, hence opting out of the church. Instead, I view fellow saints as ones with whom we are all being sanctified day by day.    
3. Where else can we go? Many people left Christ after finding his teachings in John 6:25-71 hard to understand. Afterwards, Christ turns to his disciples and asks them if they also want to leave. Peter then aptly replies, “To whom shall we go” (John 6:67-68). The church is still the best place to raise my children and the best community to grow old in. Leaving the church altogether creates a vacuum of instability in families. There is a need to think beyond ourselves and our hurt; my children don’t have to miss out on the church experience entirely because of my pain. When comparing life in church and the world, like Peter, all I can ask is, “Where else can I go?”
4. Experience is not king: If, for example, the church I attended was full of undesirable characters, it does not mean that all churches are full of such people. The seven churches in Revelation were commended for one thing and rebuked for another. We had a loveless church (Revelation 2:1-7), the persecuted church (Revelation 2:8-11), the worldly church (Revelation 2:12-17), the church of wrong doctrines (Revelation 2:18-29), the spiritually dead church (Revelation 3:1-6), the spiritually alive church (Revelation 3:7-13) and the lukewarm church (Revelation 3:14-22). Every church will be strong in some areas and weak in others. My experience in one church will not necessarily be the experience of another Christian elsewhere. Therefore, I would rather find a better church than leave the body of Christ entirely.
5. There’s always a remnant: People join ministry for different reasons (Philippians 1:15). Indeed, there are many false teachers out there who hurt God’s people. However, it is equally true that we have many authentic pastors who shepherd God’s people with integrity of heart (Psalm 78:72). The general assumption that all pastors are wolves in sheep’s clothing is unhelpful. It actually sounds more like an excuse than a significant reason for leaving the church.   

The issue of religious dones should be of significant concern to all Christians. Though one may have reasons for leaving the church, the truth is that the church, with its struggles, is still valued by Christ and is a work in progress. It still remains a safe place to do life as all other alternatives will only lead to a rebellious generation who do not know God (Judges 2:10-12).